1. Dec 4, 10:17 "David's eccentricity could win it"

   Whilst there is not too much action in the jungle, all the other evictees are living the life of riley in the ultra salubrious Versace hotel. However, with only a few days to go the balance shifts and the desire to win is surely greater than the desire to get to the delights that are in store for you in the form of a Versace apartment replete with gold taps and Gold Coast.

2. Dec 2, 10:08 "Simon took a stupid gamble"

   Non-swimmer Simon thought that the underwater challenge would be a good one for him to risk the food supply to his starving camp mates. As gamblers go, he is either a high roller or a bit stupid. As Doctor Bob applied the oxygen mask to a rather grey-looking singer, I think we made our mind up on that one.

3. Nov 24, 11:24 "David is a talentless fool"

   I have come to the conclusion that I don't like Timmy Mallett. I had that suspicion when I was 12. At 33 it is clear that first impressions are often spot on.

4. Nov 21, 09:58 "David Van Day is a peroxide idiot"

   Not only was yesterday Nicola's fake boobs' birthday, but we also welcomed the arrival of two other foreign objects into camp – in the form of captive hostages Timmy Mallet and David Van Day from Dollar – an '80s singer replete with large gut and plastic face.

5. Nov 18, 09:54 "Nicola is more than silicone"

   Day two and the jungle is already starting to take its toll. The absence of power showers, family and food all under a rainy Aussie sky can suddenly make the jungle seem an awfully long way from home.

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